Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity or How to Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean
Life gets busy. Has Radical Candor been on your reading list? Learn the key insights now.
We’re scratching the surface here. If you don’t already have Kim Scott’s bestselling book on empathetic leadership, order it here or get the audiobook for free to learn the juicy details.
About Kim Scott
Kim Scott graduated from Princeton University and completed an MBA from Harvard Business School. After completing her education, Scott began her career at a diamond-cutting factory in Moscow. Later, she held Team Lead positions at AdSense, DoubleClick, and YouTube, and was a faculty member at Apple University. Scott has also previously been a coach to CEOs of major tech companies, including Dropbox, Qualtrics, and Twitter.
Scott advocates for a direct style of management in Radical Candor. She urges managers to address challenges head-on, rather than beat about the bush. This leadership style helps improve management skills and improves productivity in the workplace. Besides Radical Candor, Scott has authored three novels. These are ‘Virtual Love’, ‘The Measurement Problem’, and ‘The Househusband’
Introduction
“I think this is an incredible book for anyone who is hoping to create better relationships in the workplace. Whether you manage 1 person or an entire company, this is for YOU.”
― Rachel Hollis, New York Times bestselling author
Radical Candor teaches a direct management approach for leaders in the workplace. The book advocates for two key attributes from managers:
- Caring for their subordinates on a personal level
- Challenging people face-to-face
Managers should get to know their subordinates at a personal and human level. They should also create a culture of honesty and direct feedback.
The premise of the book is that feedback does not have to involve hostility. Bringing humanity into the workspace helps build strong professional relationships.
Direct challenging is one of the best ways for managers to show they care about a worker’s well-being. Caring for the welfare of the workforce eventually improves performance. The book is a framework for candid conversations and proper management.
“Kim Scott has a well-earned reputation as a kick-ass boss and a voice that CEOs take seriously. In this remarkable book, she draws on her extensive experience to provide clear and honest guidance on the fundamentals of leading others: how to give (and receive) feedback, how to make smart decisions, how to keep moving forward, and much more. If you manage people―whether it be 1 person or a 1,000 – you need RADICAL CANDOR. Now.”
― Daniel Pink, author of DRIVE
Here are the key takeaways from The Radical Candor. Let us know which one you agree or disagree with by tagging us on social media.
StoryShot #1: Care Personally and Challenge Directly
Scott defines Radical Candor using two fundamental characteristics
- Personal caring for your colleagues and employees
- Addressing challenges and conflicts face-to-face
It is not enough to have only work performance fuel you on. Learn about your colleagues at a personal level.
Knowing colleagues at a personal level contradicts the notion of professionalism. Hence, a direct challenge helps strike a balance. “Radical Candor” is the fine art of caring and challenging in person. This concept helps managers cultivate a nurturing work environment and professional relationships.
Combining personal caring and direct challenge contextualizes criticism. The combination allows you to care for the recipient at the human level. Radical Candor encourages transparent communication, which helps the firm reach its goals faster.
The Radical Candor framework also shows three behavior categories:
- Obnoxious Aggression™
Obnoxious aggression is an unnecessary act of challenging someone in person with no empathy. Scott also refers to this category as front-stabbing or brutal honesty. Obnoxious aggression does not feel like sincere feedback. It cultivates impersonal relationships.
- Manipulative Insincerity™
Also known as political backstabbing, manipulative insincerity is passive-aggressive behavior. It reflects when you do not care to challenge your recipient face-to-face. This is the worst kind of feedback failure. Manipulative insincerity is a self-protective reaction to obnoxious aggression. The behavior flatters someone to their face and spews harsh criticism behind their back.
- Ruinous Empathy™
Caring personally for the recipient without honest criticism fosters ruinous empathy. A common characteristic of this behavior is sugar-coated criticism. The other is giving unclear feedback to avoid hurting the recipient.
Ruinous empathy also spares the recipient’s short-term happiness because of a lack of direct challenge. The long-term effects of ruinous empathy are adverse. Sugar-coating brings no improvement from the recipient, which hinders their growth. False feedback or silence is a feedback failure. Ruinous empathy is unhelpful and damaging to the recipient. In the end, it hurts the professional relationship.
Click to Tweet
StoryShot #2: Great Leaders Lead Through Guidance
Giving meaningful feedback motivates all stakeholders to give their best. Everyone should be empathetic to colleagues when challenging them. Empathy fuels the sharing of constructive feedback and suitable responses.
Feedback is also critical for proper professional relationships, as it encourages free communication. Positive feedback keeps employees motivated even when things are not going great. Criticism reminds everyone to check their performance and do better. A positive mindset on criticism prompts everyone to improve on their weaknesses. Ultimately, it improves the productivity of the entire team.
A leader leads by example. Start by asking for feedback from each role player before giving yours. Caring for everyone gives you enough grace to inspect the feedback. It also helps you understand each role player and their circumstances. With feedback from all parties, leaders are better equipped to make informed decisions for their team/company.
Asking for criticism builds trust. It shows your vulnerability to your colleagues or employees. Being vulnerable shows you are approachable. It adds to your relationship with your colleagues. Criticism helps you understand how it feels to receive feedback. It makes you better and more empathetic at challenging others face-to-face.
“Ultimately, though, bosses are responsible for results. They achieve these results not by doing all the work themselves but by guiding the people on their teams. Bosses guide a team to achieve results.” – Kim Scott
StoryShot #3: Emotional Presence is Essential for Good Leadership
Building trust with transparent communication is the key to success in all relationships. This applies to both professional and personal relationships. Good leadership requires emotional presence, clear guidance, teamwork, and results. Deep, personal caring and good leadership are a firm foundation for trusting relationships.
Scott previously ran a diamond-cutting company in Moscow. She uses an example from this experience. In the example, she attracted diamond cutters to join her company by offering them a better deal. The diamond cutters were willing to switch employers because they felt valued. Scott showed empathy and personal concern for their well-being.
Caring for a person does not happen without putting in the work. Barriers to personal caring include:
- Arrogance because you hold a position of power or feel superior to your colleagues
- Inability or refusal to show vulnerability
- Obsession with the belief that professionalism does not involve personal interaction
Personal caring goes beyond simple activities, such as acknowledging a colleague’s birthday. It requires dedication and conscious time investment to understand all involved parties. Knowing any factors that might affect the relationship strengthens the team at large.
“The first dimension is about being more than “just professional”. It’s about giving a damn, sharing more than just your work self, and encouraging everyone who reports to you to do the same. It’s not enough to care only about people’s ability to perform a job. To have a good relationship, you have to be your whole self and care about each of the people who work for you as a human being. It’s not just business; it is personal, and deeply personal. I call this dimension “Care Personally.””
– Kim Scott
StoryShot #4: Put Deliberate Efforts into Understanding Your Colleagues
No relationship thrives when the role players do the bare minimum. To understand your colleagues, you must figure out how their jobs fit into their life goals. Different people derive inspiration from different things, depending on where their interests lie.
Every firm has two major employee groups: superstars and rock stars. Superstars are employees with high ambitions and goals. Rock stars are happy with what they have and are not looking for further promotions.
“The best way to keep superstars happy is to challenge them and make sure they are constantly learning.” – Kim Scott
Rock stars are not inclined towards instant gratification. They are also the stronghold of the team. Rock stars are stable and on a gradual growth trajectory. Most of them have ventured outside their roles in your firm and are content with what they have.
If you have a rock star holding a particular position, do not force growth on them. Allow them to flourish in their comfort as long as they meet the firm’s goals. Each role player is on a personal journey. Every growth step for them should be a product of their deliberate effort. Forcing growth on them might harm the relationship, or you may lose the employee.
What You Can Do as a Leader
As a leader, focus not only on the superstars, but also on the rock stars. Strive to know what every role player desires. To accommodate everyone, it’s important to shift talent management efforts toward growth management. Candid conversations should not make rock stars feel inferior or too plain. The conversations should not be overbearing, yet not boring to the rock stars.
“If you lead a big organization, you can’t have a relationship with everybody. But the relationships you have with your direct reports will impact the relationships they have with their direct reports. The ripple effect will go a long way toward creating – or destroying – a positive culture. Relationships may not scale, but culture does.” – Kim Scott
Try to understand each employee’s path and personal growth targets. Then you can incorporate assessment tools to help each employee keep up with their goals. Tools such as quarterly check-ins will help employees do the following:
- Assess their goals
- Know their progress
- Project their future goals and how to achieve them
Managers should be careful with assigning labels to employees. Titles such as ‘top performer’ unnecessarily pressure the recipient. Instead, use Jared Smith’s classification terms, such as:
- “Off quarter”
- “Solid quarter”
- “Exceptional quarter”
One person can likely oscillate between the quarters with time.
StoryShot #5: Be Open to Criticism
Good leaders challenge their followers. They are also open to criticism to cultivate collaboration and strong relationships. It’s normal to make mistakes. Yet, willingness to accept criticism and correction is the key to earning respect.
In fact, open communication is essential for healthy relationships. Direct challenge builds a collaborative culture in the workplace. With open criticism, you can cultivate harmonic teamwork. Challenging someone face-to-face shows you care about their well-being. The critique allows the recipient to grow in their respective spheres.
“When bosses are too invested in everyone getting along they also fail to encourage the people on their team to criticize one another other for fear of sowing discord. They create the kind of work environment where being “nice” is prioritized at the expense of critiquing and therefore improving actual performance.” – Kim Scott
Accepting criticism with grace shows responsibility. A responsible person is not afraid to admit their mistakes. Acceptance helps those willing to work with others grow within the team. Most people are reluctant to challenge others because they fear potential conflict. Yet, you must acknowledge that sometimes conflict can occur for the betterment of the organization.
Personal caring is acknowledging all the emotions that might come with candid conversations. Understanding is necessary for giving and receiving criticism, and helps build trust. In fact, the best way to ease criticism is by addressing the issue face-to-face. Solving issues helps build a relationship based on trust and respect.
“The way you ask for criticism and react when you get it goes a long way toward building trust—or destroying it.” – Kim Scott
Rating
We rate this book 4.2/5.
Editor’s Note
This article was first published on July 30, 2022.
EN 
PT 
ES 
JA 
DE 
FR 
TR 
IT 
PL 
UK 
SV 
FI 
NL 
KO
Leave a Reply